God gave us a pair of ears, to hear. Or should I say to Listen ?......... Hearing is a function which your body does it consciously as well as unconsciously, but Listening is a conscious effort. It requires concentration, so that your mind can process the information it hears.

So in ideal situation, we first hear the voice or the information and then our mind processes the voice, which is called as Listening. I once read, “Good conversation starts with Good Listening”.

However at times, we might just stop at the first stage it i.e. Hearing.

For example - When we are driving and at the same time we are talking on phone,it might happen that our mind is more concentrating on driving as such we are just hearing and not Listening to the person on phone.

It happens with me too. When I am cooking ,I need lot of concentration, at that time if TV or radio is on ,I am just hearing it but not Listening.I may not be aware of what discussion the radio jockey was doing ,since I was just hearing him, my mind was busy with doing something else.

Let me share with you some common instances when were we just Listening and not hearing.

• Multitasking

      When we are multitasking, say driving and talking on phone, watching TV and eating etc.

• Boredom

When we are not interested in the conversation or the information which is given, this is the most common instance when we just hear and not Listen. For example. I used to never Listen to Economics lectures in college; my mind could never concentrate on it because I used to find the subject itself boring. So boredom is definitely one important reason for not Listening.

• Stress

If you are stresses or in a bad mood, and your mind is occupied with a couple of things and you generally tend to just hear and not Listen.

• Angry or in an Argument

When we are angry with someone or when we are in middle of an argument, our ego or anger might be so strong that we tend not Listen to other person point of view. For example. I never Listened to my moms advice to learn cooking, I even used to argue with her ,that I will learn it when its required and I used to ignore it .I never gave a complete thought to the what is being said by her.

So how important is Listening?

Listening is very important. I would say by Listening to what is being said you are appreciating/respecting the other person thoughts, which is very important part of interpersonal skills.

It important to Listen to what is being said, irrespective of whether you agree to it or agree. But Listen to the full information carefully first before judging it .

Do not judge on basis of what you hear and on things partially heared.So it’s important to be an Active Listener.

Active Listening as such consist of three parts

Hearing

Hearing is basically capturing the sound wave. The voice has reached and is heard by your ears.

For example, When I say “Today is not my birthday” and if your able to repeat the sentence exactly that means you did hear me .

Understanding

Next step is Understanding what you hear i.e. processing the information which is being said. In above example when I say “Today is not my birthday”, and if your mind is able to understand that Khyati’s birthday is not today i.e. it s not on 2^nd May, that means you understood the message clearly.

Judging

Last step is judging what you hear and understand. After hearing that today is not my birthday, your mind will understand, it will judge and think that, if today is not Khyati’s birthday then when  is her birthday? So you might ask me “If today is not your birthday ,then when is your birthday?”

So by hearing, understanding and judging correctly what we hear, we can become an Active Listener.

Hope you where Listening to me. Tomorrow I will be talking to you on how to improve your Listening skills. Have a Good Day.